“You have to!”
“No, Janelle, we don’t!!”
“Look, you want our advice or not. To play in this century you have to tweet.”
And so we were dragged, kicking and streaming into the 280 keystroke world of twitter. We’ve now got a skookum website and some rockin’ youtubes. We podcast like Orcas and are twittering away on tweeter these days to say nothing of being completely bookfaced most of the time, or whatever.
Dr. Rob Sealey and I now have four good tweets a week and we feel better for it. It’s a load off our minds to be able to bring to you the medical headlines from across the planet and summarize them in 280 strokes, complete with insightful, detailed commentary. Some of them may cause you to change your life, others may cause you to change your Fruit of the Looms.
-An exciting new vaccine appears to cure prostate cancer in mice! Next step is to test on rats, then lawyers, baboons and finally humans.
-Peppermint is superb for gut aches and spasms but can aggravate anal itchiness. Thinking of branding a peppermint drug. “Scratch and Wind.”
-New study shows men with ED have very high incidence of sleep apnea. Guess the only breath their taking away these days… is their own.
-Latest medical news reveals that drinking coffee may reduce prostate cancer risk…apparently Starbucks is already marketing the Prostalatte
-Recent medical journal headline “Heavy cell phone use might raise risk of brain tumours.” Glad my cell phone only weighs 3 ounces.
-Study shows that exercising only one hour per week reduces the incidence of colonic polyps. Get a runner’s high, avoid a high colonic.
-A new study reveals that motivational text messages will help smokers to quit…especially if they’re from the coroner.
-Those with rheumatoid arthritis found to be predisposed to have COPD(emphysema/bronchitis) proving smoking joints does cause lung disease.
-Study shows that hard short interval exercise is much healthier than endurance exercise. Doesn’t mean an interval of every three years.
-A recent study revealed that too much sex could cause a cerebral hemorrhage…another good reason to get married.
-Actual headline in April Archives of Surgery. “Hungover Surgeons (redundant?) Make More Mistakes.” What’s next? Life found to be terminal?
-Talking about parasites and worms on our appetizing radio show. On a similar note there is a election debate in my town today…
-Research shows survival of a heart attack is highest in a gym than anywhere else. Maybe the fear of being seen dead in Spandex?
-Canadian researchers show that pregnancy is safe for women with MS. Safer for women with MRS.
-Study shows that gambling on computers is leading to some serious addiction problems. I gambled on a PC and lost.
-As doctors, we always have to attend courses to update our skills…today’s course is Bear Mountain Golf Resort.
-10 grams of soluble fibre/day is the key to trimming bad internal (visceral) fat. Bad fat is the key to trimming longevity problems.
-Had a great interview today with the remarkable Bif Naked and like the mature MDs we are we resisted all naked jokes. We focused on Biffys.
-More and more conditions are proving to be genetic. Even the ability to have kids is hereditary; if your parents didn’t, you probably won’t.
-Recent study shows that flossing a mouth full of teeth actually prevents the nasty pancreatic cancer! Well, there goes my hockey team.